40 week pregnancy update
Admitting Desire, Mother Blessing, Couples bucketlist.
Beautiful people,
Welcome to my 40 weeks of pregnancy update.
In full transparency, I’m actually writing this a few days early, with the intention to schedule this to come out on Friday as I will have been pregnant for 40 weeks then…Though that also means theres a tiny chance baby could already be here.
I was mostly sure I’d likely go into labour before 40 weeks this time around. Rafi was born at 41+4. I feel better now, than I did at the same stage with him. I am one of those women who really enjoys the last stages of pregnancy. I know it’s not for everyone - though for me, I love the slow. I love the liminal psychedelic drip of hormones. I love how much food I want to eat, how good an afternoon nap feels.
I love how much I tend to my needs with no guilt.
Not that I often feel guilt. Just sometimes micro guilts weaving in and out - as many roles call me many ways. Though at this stage of pregnancy, most drop away and I love the peace of simply being here in this. Inviting in pleasure and attunement to the moment.
I love how my body feels, this pregnant. Even though over the pregnancy I’ve had way more pain in my inner left pelvis, that’s induced many tears and tenderness, Right now - My body is happy.
In today’s update, I’d love to share about
My feelings around truly admitting what I want for this birthing experience, VS trying to stay “realistic” (Which, by the way is SO unlike me, I’ve always been a dreamer, an expander for myself, and to even put the word realistic in my vocabulary feels incredibly foreign.)
Some photos from my mothers blessing I had hosted for me at 37 weeks and how it helped me come back into a place of expansion.
My birth affirmations (I’m not too keen on the fluffy, “my yoni opens like a lotus” type ones. But I’ll share with you what’s felt resonant for this birth) (This may eventuate into it’s own post)
The Birth song, we currently sing each day and will sing to baby to help transitioning.
Navigating creative energy this late in a pregnancy.
Discuss the idea of a couples bucket list.
Many of you already know that part of the initial reason I started substack was to create a safe place to share about my personal life. I shared like an open book for free on social media, almost daily for close to 10 years, and the last couple of years has had me craving privacy. Not from you. Mainly from all the people who don’t understand my life philosophy, way I want to raise my kids, live etc.
The nature of social media means anyone can find you, whenever, and as much as I had hoped everyone who stumbled across me would be a future best friend,
There are also many strange faces popping up.
I moved to substack for my intimate sharing, Where I dive deeper and trust in the holding here.
Part of that means my bigger pregnancy, conception, home life, and relationship discussions are often released for paid subscribers, as I know that those who are willing to pay, will often hold the words differently.
Thank you for those who are willing to play in this space with me.
Mother Blessing
Through the valleys, hidden in the hills is a beautiful cosy white handmade dome. It’s covered in pink bougainvillaea and sits right beside a big lake surrounded by forest.