In sickness & in health

What seeds do we plant in our children when they are sick

I find the conversation around sickness & kids, really do go hand in hand. 

Raising children who all play at playgrounds, and get their hands into everything.

It’s inevitable to catch a thing or two, build the immune system. Nature is pretty clever in that regard, but it so doesn’t mean it’s always a pleasant experience. 

My mum always tells me - When you’re sick, you’re going through ascension symptoms. 

Honestly, there was a time I believed that.

Now I just smile at her and say, maybe mum. 

*Cringe a little internally*

Though as I think about sickness more (Specifically this gnarly flu going around Aus)

I do see it as an upgrade from nature of sorts. It rapidly evolves our immune systems, and has our bodies stronger and more attuned to the next season, and a build up towards the following winter. 

It literally is an upgrade of the physical body, and yes of course there would be energetic properties within that, though to say that getting sick means you’re super woke, feels a bit much for me these days haha. 

I think back to my childhood, raised on a little farm. I have vivid memories of having colds/ flus and once pneumonia as a 12 year old. Apart from the pneumonia which resulted in a putrid pink liquid antibiotic that I can literally still smell and taste on my tongue and sends shivers down my spine, 

The rest were always treated naturally, often with homeopathic, rest and food. 

I could probably count on two fingers the amount of times I ever remember neurophen being offered. 

If we were nauseas, we sat with it. If we had a headache, migraine, we sat with it. Fever, it was encouraged to run it’s course to actually burn and work on the virus. 

It wasn’t about “let’s get back to feeling good asap” and more about - it’s safe to be uncomfortable in the body. This is a SIGN that the body IS working. 

So when I birthed Rafi and he got his first ‘big thing’ around 5 or 6 months (roseola virus)

It felt important to reflect on how I would speak to him, and knowing that even though he was a baby, everything I spoke about his body, his ability to heal, his immune system etc, would later become his story, seeded in the deeper parts of his consciousness. 

Every single time he would get something 

(Roseola virus, a decent little 48 hr virus, hand foot and mouth 3 times in one winter etc)

Or 

Every time he would hurt himself/ fall over/ stack it on the scooter 

I’d be incredibly mindful of the stories I was speaking to him about his body. 

It was never “Oh poor Rafi” 

And never “Oh you’re sick! Let’s get you better”

When he’s mid power spew, crying and feeling nauseous, - even though I think “poor baby” because I’m his mum and don’t want him feeling so shit, 

The words I speak aloud, every single time

“Good job body, I know this feels scary/ uncomfortable. Your body is doing exactly what it needs to do right now. Well done”

When he’s not feeling well, 

It’s always ‘Wow, you’re doing such a good job healing Rafi. Your body is healing so fast, your immune system is getting so strong”

And we will speak about the food he’s eating. 

“Which colour would you like to eat next? Orange and red, for vitamin C? That keeps your immune system strong. Or maybe that brown there, that one has lots of minerals and gives your body energy. That one there has fats, so you can play all day. Etc”

So that he understands how food heals and works with the body. 

If his fever is running hot, I tell him even though it’s uncomfortable, his body is working perfectly (Literally because it is), though I’ll ask if he’d like some homeopathic to help the healing. 

When he falls and hurts himself, I ask how his body feels, if he’d like a cuddle or to continue playing, and usually it’s keep playing.

These words may not mean so much when they are little or we assume they don’t understand, 

But one time I began feeling unwell, I had a headache and didn’t know how to explain it to Rafi. So I said “Mummys just feeling a bit sick right now)

And Rafi, at just over 2.5 yrs old rolled over in bed and told me that I wasn’t sick, and that my immune system was healing me. And that he could help *Puts his little healer hands on my head*. 

These words, may not mean much when they are little…. But they become the seeds which grow into the entire stories of who they are and their health and wellbeing. 

A child told they are always sick and unwell, becomes an adult always sick and unwell. 

A child taught the weavings of the body, 

Trusts their body as they grow. 

A child handed medication every time they Get a  mild fever, becomes an adult who can’t handle being in discomfort in their body. 

A child taught that food and herbs can heal, and that there are medications should they truly need it, 

Becomes an adult who knows how to heal their body, and to lean on medications when it’s necessary.

I also promise you we are just winging this with this. 

We don’t take a class on “How to talk to your kids about sickness”.

I think it’s up to each of us to kinda unpack that for ourselves. 

This is where we have landed and what feels good, and age appropriate for our three year old, though we would speak this way to him at 7 months old too. 

I do notice it requires a reconditioning of sorts too,

Because it feels simple enough to speak to him in this way when I’m feeling good and I’m the mother, 

But it’s also a skillset to be able to hold this same standard for myself, 

And have him witness that in me too. 

My internal dialogue when I’m unwell is “I’m sick”. Because that’’s how I grew up. It takes active effort to switch it over to gratitude for my immune system within my mind. 

I have to be mindful that Rafi isn’t hearing me talk to Tully about how I’m feeling so “sick”, when that’s not the dialogue I use with him. 

It’s a reconditioning for me, to lean into trusting my body, my immune system, and the intelligence of this human vessel. Trust there is so much happening FOR ME that I won’t ever understand. Reminding myself that bodies can heal. 

And BEING an embodiment of that for Rafi too. 

I have my own work to do still, even though I do believe my parents set me up in the beginning well, with being ok with discomfort and resting etc. 

Though my work is my own, and while I do it, 

I hope that Rafi doesn’t have to go and undo a bunch of body stories. 

We speak about body image all the time, 

But what about body feeling.
Body healing. 

What are the cultural norms here that we adopt but really when we sit with it, don’t actually believe. 

I also find being around people who value the body and natural healing, immunity etc to be helpful. When we were recently down and out with the flu, we had meals dropped off and this delicious high vit C tea, oils etc. 

And we would all drink the tea together, use the oils and chest balm, eat healing food. 

Rafi got a taste of what it’s like to heal though discomfort. 

He also got a taste of heading to the ER (As he was throwing up blood and that felt beyond my scope). 

He didn’t like his blood pressure taken, or the numbing patches on his arms in case of a drip, or the toe pricks to check his fluids. 

He asked to go home. 

I am grateful to have access to that system when needed, 

And

I’m grateful for him that feels unfamiliar and not the “go to” solution, above teas and foods and healing rest. 

After 3, almost 4 long weeks (Tul and Raf recovered way quicker than this pretty mama), and my flu evolving into a 10 day sinus infection, yesterday was the first day I woke up without pain. Celebrating this body, and that my family is healthy and well. 

Love Kat

I’m excited to get onto some publications for paid subscribers this week. Normally I only do 1-2 free publications a month, though there’s been 4 or so this month alone haha. Hope you’ve enjoyed all the free content! xx Love Kat